Scripture Reading: Proverbs 15:1-7
Have You Said it Lately?
Intro.
1. Communication is key to every relationship:
a. God has communicated to mankind, Heb. 1:1-2; Acts 20:32.
b. Brethren in the church, 1 Cor. 14:9.
c. Husbands and wives, 1 Pet. 3:7.
2. Good communication skills draw a couple closer together.
3. Lack of effective communication is a leading threat to successful, fulfilling marriages, Prov. 15:1-2, 4, 7; Jas. 3:5.
a. Leading reason marriages fail. A relationship never just ends; it ends slowly. It ends over time. (The Number 1 Reason Marriages Fail, David Wygant, huffingtonpost.com)
b. Without communication, conflict resolution becomes impossible, and the smallest problems become insurmountable.
4. Marriage is a 100%-100% relationship; Not, 50%-50%!
5. Some things that must be said and heard regularly in marriages.
I. "I LOVE YOU."
A. Love is a Decision of the Will, Col. 3:19; Eph. 5:25.
1. Christ chose to love the church; You choose to love your wife.
2. Love is embedded within your vows: Your pledge of loyalty, the promise of faithful devotion goes far beyond emotional yearnings.
B. Romance Ebbs and Flows, but Love Must be Constant, 1 Cor. 13:4-8.
1. Love is spoken in words and in actions, 1 Jno. 3:16-18.
2. How you speak to each other; how you treat one another; when we help each other in the home, etc.
II. "I WAS WRONG, I AM SORRY, PLEASE FORGIVE ME." Eph. 4:31-32 (Col. 3:12-13)
A. Sins against Your Spouse Require Repentance and Forgiveness, Just like Any Other Sin.
1. "I'm sorry" can become a quick way to escape an immediate problem, with no real intent to change; that is worldly sorrow.
-Godly sorrow and repentance, 2 Cor. 7:9-10 (Judas, Matt. 27:3-5).
2. Pride is a great hindrance to this needed communication!
-Must always be right; rigid, judgmental, condescending...
B. Some Common Sins in Marriage (Demanding Repentance and Forgiveness):
1. Sins of anger, Prov. 15:1, 18.
a. Harsh words, temper outbursts, Prov. 29:22.
b. "A marriage with too much conflict, hostility, blame, criticism, defensiveness, and belligerent verbal attacks seems like life with an enemy instead of a friend." (Dr. Val Farmer, To Have and To Hold, farmandranchguide.com)
2. Sins of immorality, Heb. 13:4.
a. Not confined to sexual immoralities, although these often land a deathblow to marriages, cf. Prov. 6:27, 32-35.
b. Sins of lying undermine trust and security, Eph. 4:25.
c. Love of money introduces a new priority with devastating results, 1 Tim. 6:9-10.
3. Sins of unfaithfulness to God, Matt. 6:33-34; Eph. 5:31-32.
a. Christian husband must lead in the way of faith, Josh. 24:15.
b. Help each other grow spiritually in service to God, Eccl. 4:9-12.
III. "I FORGIVE YOU." Luke 11:4
A. Holding Grudges is Devastating to a Marriage, Matt. 6:14-15.
1. Unmerciful, lack of forgiveness, Matt. 5:7; Jas. 2:13.
2. Causes and sustains contention and conflict, barriers and obstacles that erode the relationship and squashes effective communication.
3. Generates bitterness, resentment, devaluing each other, Col. 3:19.
IV. "THANK YOU."
A. Gratitude Genuinely Expressed Strengthens the Bonds of Affection.
1. In everything give thanks, 1 Thess. 5:18.
2. Even when the other is ungrateful, cf. Lk. 6:35 (be like God).
3. Builds goodwill and avoids taking each other for granted.
V. "LET US PRAY." 1 Pet. 3:7
A. Prayer in the Home is a Faith-Strengthening Event.
1. Before every meal, 1 Tim. 4:4-5.
2. Pray together, and pray individually for each other, Jas. 5:16.
Conclusion
We honor our spouse and our marriage when we improve our communication with each other. Furthermore, we honor God, who gave it.
By: Joe R. Price
Posted: May 17, 2016