KEEPING YOUR MARRIAGE STRONG

 

 

Intro.

1.  Matt. 19:6 - It is sin to put asunder our marriage ["divorce," depart, separate; derived from the idea of a chasm (chora), an empty expanse, such as the countryside between villages].

2.  Heb. 13:4 - Marriage is an honorable institution & is to be honored by all people, including those who are married.

3.  Gen. 2:18, 23-24 - God endorses marriage & provides for its success.

4.  Question is: Will we obey His will in our marriage so that it can succeed?!

5.  Six truths to help keep your marriage strong:

 

I.  CHARACTER IS MORE IMPORTANT THAN TECHNIQUE.

  1.  Common mistake: Thinking things constitute happiness in a marriage, rather than being the right kind of person. 2 Cor. 8:12

    -Example: 1 Tim. 6:10.

  2.  The Character Of Christ (Gal. 2:20; Col. 3:10):

    -Love - Eph. 5:25; Titus 2:4; Eph. 5:2.

    -Humility (not selfish pride) - Phil. 2:3-4.

    -Honesty - Eph. 5:25.

      (Generates trust, security & commitment between you - Gen. 2:24; Matt. 19:5).

 

II.  LOVE KEEPS NO RECORD OF WRONGS.

  Of your partner's sins - 1 Cor. 13:5-7.

  Of your goodness ("I've done…, therefore I deserve…") - 1 Cor. 13:4.

    -Kindly forgiving each other - Eph. 4:32.

    -Healing - Eph. 4:31.

 

III.  BEING IN A MARRIAGE CARRIES AN OBLIGATION TO COMMUNICATE.

  Be honest & open with each other. No secrets!

  By listening:

    -To each other - Jas. 1:19.

    -To instruction - Prov. 19:20.

    -To wisdom - Prov. 8:32.

  By talking:

    -Plainly - Gal. 4:16; cf. 1 Cor. 14:9.

    -Kindly - Jas. 3:9-12; cf. Prov. 14:3; 15:1-2; 20:3; 25:11.

    -Often - Prov. 12:25; 15:23.

 

IV.  FORGIVENESS IS A CHOICE, NOT A FEELING.

  A constant choice - Matt. 18:21-22.

  A choice of the heart - Matt. 18:35.

  A choice of mercy - Matt. 6:14-15.

 

V.  LOVE IS A COMMITMENT, NOT A FEELING.

  It is a decision of will which is carried out by action - Matt. 5:44-45.

    -Husbands: As Christ loved the church; as you love yourself - Eph. 5:25, 28-29; 1 Pet. 3:7.

   -Wives: As the church loves Christ - Eph. 5:24 (cf. Jno. 14:15); 1 Pet. 3:5-6.

  Must decide to have an overriding commitment to each other which is far deeper than the flesh & emotions.

 

VI.  READING MINDS IS NOT SOMETHING HUMAN BEINGS DO WELL.

  1 Cor. 2:11 - Therefore…

    -Don't assume…verify! 1 Tim. 6:4 (evil suspicions/surmising).

   -Communicate (discuss & resolve - Matt. 5:23-24).

  This is greatly helped when trust is established & maintained in a marriage.

 

Conclusion

1.  Everyone faces challenges in marriage.

2.  Those who succeed work at keeping their marriage healthy, happy & in harmony with the will of God!

 

-Adapted from Connections Christian Counselling:   http://www.connections.ndirect.co.uk/wedserm.html